30 days from today, I will be Mrs. Tara Kirkman!

The past few weeks have been a whirlwind, and I sense it is only going to get more intense. I've got a lot accomplished though. The bakery I finally settled on is called Paddy Cake Bakery, located in Pittsburgh's Bloomfield neighborhood. The samples we tasted were amazing, and we were able to get the cake/pudding combo we wanted. The whole experience was such a contrast to the other ones. The coordinator was oustanding and I am happy with the design I've chosen. And the price made me even happier - a 3 tier cake for $275 - much more reasonable in my mind. Especially after I sampled a $600 cake and it tasted like shit.

I have had a few snafus, particularly regarding my dress, but I think everything is on track now. As you may recall, I bought a basic dress from eBay about a year ago. The plan was to make some alterations to give it a more "vintage" look. My seamstress, a friend of a friend, took on the project but then realized - very recently - that it would be more difficult to 'disassemble and rebuild' the dress versus starting from scratch with a pattern and a dozen yards of fabric.

At first, I was skeptical...and a little alarmed. But as a professional graphic artist, I can actually understand the logic behind what she had explained to me - as it happens all the time. Someone comes to me with some piece of shit project that they want revamped. Often, it's somebody elses' work that I have to go in and disassemble and try to modify to make it look less like shit. This process can be very aggravating and time-consuming. As crazy as it sounds, I actually prefer to just scrap it and start fresh, with my own design. This takes less time and is much more satisfying in the end. Can you say, control freak? :P

So I was on board with her new plan of attack - and after she found a pattern of a vintagey dress online, we went shopping and I picked out the fabric. It was a little maddening, as I had a hard time imagining the finished product while draping bolts of fabric across my body. But again, I trust my seamstress knows what she is doing so I purchased the materials that she needed. I definitely spent way more on the materials than I anticipated - and way more than I thought I was going to spend on the first one. As I think I've stated before, I've basically failed at being a budget wedding warrior - but from what I've read and what many people have told me, paying a little less than $300 for a wedding dress (that I truly love) is still considered a bargain.

The upswing is that I am going to have a custom, one-of-a-kind, vintage-style wedding dress that I think is going to be absolutely gorgeous - much more so that the first one. I am basically getting exactly what I want, totally tailored to my body, and I think something that will become a very sentimental family heirloom.

Aside from the dress excitement, Dan and I hosted our non-traditional wedding shower last weekend at my Dad's house. The idea behind the 'shower' was to include both men, women, kids - and keep it very casual. Stuffy, traditional bridal showers are just not my cup of tea. So we planned a backyard picnic - grilled food, beer and lawn games. The invite list was kept pretty small too, only close friends and family.

In hindsight, I probably should have reconsidered even having it. Because my Mom was in the hospital for 2 weeks in the beginning of July, the whole process of planning/sending invitations got pushed back. But the ball was in motion and I decided to follow through despite the shower having to be so close to the wedding. The other factor was the mild confusion that was experienced by some who had a hard time understanding the logic behind our non-traditional shower.

One of the requests we made was to *not* buy/bring gifts from our registries. Instead, we asked our guests to bring bottles of wine or liquor so that we could build up our 'stock'. We then labeled each one with who got it for us, so we could remember and appreciate it more when we cracked them open. I didn't think this was too off-the-wall a concept - but perhaps it was to some.

We are so thankful to everyone who helped us that day. Everyone chipped in to some degree and made the day relaxing and fun for us. A big shout out to my sis and maid-of honour, Andrea, who really took charge of the setup and cleanup.

In addition, we've been placing food/decoration orders and making final payments for the vendors. We also bought eachother our wedding bands. Scary stuff - as there is no turning back now. Well, there is, but that's certainly not a concern.

Now I am tackling various crafty projects for the wedding. I love this stuff, but wish I had more time for it. I hate only having an hour or two in the evening to work on things. If I could, I'd work on stuff all day. Last night I designed the centerpiece for the bridal party table and was pleasantly surprised with the finished product. I suppose being the daughter of a florist who designed dozens of wedding floral arrangements rubbed off a little. :)

This weekend we are attending the wedding of friends who are getting married in a barn, about 2 hours outside of the city. I'm really looking forward to it, as I have a not-so-secret love for rural settings. My dream wedding when I was younger was to be married in the woods, but alas, I was unable to do that. So in a way, I will appreciate this wedding in a vicarious way.

The other exciting part of this weekend is that Dan and I decided to book a room at a local bed & breakfast for the night, so we won't have to drive the 2 hours back after the reception. It's in of course a beautiful old farmhouse, nestled in the mountains. The next day (Monday) is Labor Day, and we both have off (amazing!) so we are going to explore a nearby state park, specifically to see Fallingwater which is the famous home designed by Frank Lloyd Wright on top of a waterfall (owned by the famous Kaufmann Family) - and now a museum that offers tours during the day.

We're psyched to actually do something relaxing and romantic for a change. I think it will really help me as I dive into the final push towards our special day.

50 Days and Counting...

In the famous words of Etta James, "Aaaaat Laaaast..." - I finally got my wedding invitations mailed out. After nearly 3 months of production time and approximately 9 hrs of final assembly time with 2 people helping, this huge project is off my plate. Yes, I know, it was entirely self-imposed...but I had a vision, and inspiration to create a memorable invitation, don't ask me why.

Anyways, I want to give a big shout-out to my awesome sister Andrea and our friend Allison who helped me out. It would have easily taken me a week to assemble them by myself. I felt bad enough as they were supposed to go out at the beginning of July but due to my Mom's unforeseen health crisis that consumed my spare time the last week of June through the 2nd week of July, it kind of made it impossible. I may have lost some etiquette points, but whatever, I'm not going to lose sleep over it.

Now with that madness behind me, I am attacking the massive list of remaining things to do with determination and ferocity. My goal, like most brides, is to minimize the stress during the week of the wedding. Hopefully, with some cooperation and organization on my part, I can make this happen.

This weekend I hope to finally conquer the cake situation. I'm kind of to the point of not caring, as every bakery has been a disappointment, either they have limited, unappealing options or they are way out of my budget. I am picking up samples today from a bakery near the reception site. Saturday, I meet with their wedding coordinator to discuss pricing and other options. I'm bringing my checkbook as I think I'll just choose something and be done with it.

I'm not going to list all the stuff left on my list, just thinking about it is exhausting. But I'm confident it'll all come together...it has to, right?

2 MONTHS TO GO!

Sixty days and counting. Still lots to do. But a few big items have been checked off my list, so I feel somewhat productive. The invitations are set to go out next week.

I realized something insane a few minutes ago, which prompted this post. This Saturday, my company is hosting their annual Summer picnic aboard one of the Gateway Clipper boats. Originally, I really wanted to have my reception on one of the boats, having attended a fantastic reception aboard one several years prior.

But when Dan and I met with their wedding coordinator last Summer to get an idea of cost, we almost fell out of our chairs. The base rates for the packages were $8,000 for the small boat and $16,000 for the large boat, more if you added on things like more time onboard, better food & alcohol, etc.

Each package includes 4 hours up and down Pittsburgh's three rivers, hors'doerves, alcohol, waitstaff including bartender, impressive food choices, the cake, decorations, all linens/catering rentals, a dj, photography, flowers/centerpieces, free parking for guests, plus a stay in the Station Square Sheraton for the bride and groom.

At the time, we foolishly believed we could pull the whole thing off for about $5k so we politely thanked the wedding coordinator and ripped up the brochures she gave us. Looking back, those packages are actually a STEAL. Chew on that for a minute.

Sure, people can have weddings for under $5k. It is totally possible, but you will have to make HUGE sacrafices and be SUPER creative, plus have an ARMY of friends and family help you with basically everything. And definitely no more than 100 guests.

If you commit to having it at any kind of facility that frequently hosts weddings/receptions (that is not a fire hall) and you have at least 150 people, you are looking at an easy $1-2k just to rent the space. Then pile on at least $3-5k for FOOD, the staff, linens, chairs/table/other rentals. Tack on another $1-2k for ALCOHOL unless you want to be a dick and make it a cash-bar.

So you're already at maybe $5-8k and that does not include the cost of: bride's dress/veil/accessories/shoes, the rings, the flowers, the cake, photography/videography, a dj or band, the ceremony (if it's not at the same location as the reception), decorations, programs, car rental, hotel stay, gifts for the wedding party, tips for the vendors, the invitations/save the date cards (don't forget postage!), a wedding shower of some kind, the bachelor/bachelorette parties, hair styling/manicures and oh yeah, maybe a honeymoon. EASILY all of that shit will add up to another $10-12k, for a rough total estimate of about $15-20k...at a MINIMUM.

So...yeah, $8-16k for almost everything you need is actually a pretty good deal plus the added fun of partying on a gorgeous cruise boat for your reception. It's also pretty accurate for what an average (Pittsburgh) wedding costs these days (if you don't have any vendors who can donate their services), based off my observations and calculations in the past year.

But I consider myself very lucky. I got some AMAZING deals of my own and I am quite proud of my efforts to strike a balance between frugal and fabulous in order to keep the costs down.

We are also extremely grateful for the amazing friends and family members who are able to help us...there is no way we could do this without them. Well, there is, but it would definitely knock us quick a few pegs down on the 'fabulous scale'. :)

The past month and other thoughts as we round second base...

82 days until the wedding!? On one hand it seems like plenty of time, on another it seems like its tomorrow.

They weren't kidding when they said that time would fly from when we set the date until the wedding. Oh, how I wish I had done things differently...but alas, even an organized freak like me can make mistakes and misjudge the workload involved in planning a wedding. Well, there is no point in looking back, I am forging ahead and focusing on the "need to do now" stuff as it smacks me in the face. Which feels like a daily occurrence.

However, I did get a PANTLOAD of things done in the past month. Too much to list. My biggest accomplishment has been the crazy invitations. I slaved over the designs and text for WEEKS. And after finally finalizing them, I printed them (myself) last week and will have them assembled (because there are multiple parts) and mailed out soon. I am definitely submitting photos of the finished product to several sites that showcase over-the-top invitations, because, well...mine is the very definition of over-the-top. And I love them.

I also went on an insane shopping spree at several craft stores last weekend. I had gathered coupons and then waited patiently for a sale. The 4th of July is that magic time when all of the sales go on steroids. It was great, I got all of the remaining crafty things and decorations I needed at half the cost I would have paid normally. Yay, coupons!

Though on a sad note, it was really hard shopping for the silk flowers I needed. My Mom was a silk florist my whole life until her stroke, and she was the best floral designer I've ever known. She knew everything about floral design and even ran her own business out of our home. She was a guru.

So when I was wandering around Michael's floral department, stupefied by the choices and trying to design arrangements in my head, I really felt the void of not having her by my side. Don't get me wrong, I am thankful she is still alive and can visit her in the nursing home so frequently, but it sucked that she couldn't be there, gathering the flowers and materials she needed to create my arrangements and centerpieces, while I pushed the cart. A few times, I caught myself trying to imagine what she would have done and hopefully, I came close enough to what she would have chosen.

Either way, she will help me as I design some of the arrangements, as she can still give input and guide me, even though she physically is unable to do the work. And I am thankful for that.

Moving along...

I feel like I should change the name of this blog to BudgetWeddingFailure, as we are so far over budget it's ridiculous. Then again, if we wanted to stay within our budget we would have just eloped. If I have learned anything in my 8 or so months of wedding planning it's that even cheapo weddings still cost a friggin' fortune.

Sure, there are fantastic ways to cut corners and be thrifty if you aren't a bridezilla...but when it comes to catering and furniture rentals, there is no dodging those bullets, unless you have the flexibility to provide those things on your own. Most venues, aside from country fields and backyards, require those things when you rent the venue.

Without those things, your guests will likely be rather uncomfortable and/or annoyed. Of course some couples are assholes and don't really care about the comfort of their guests...which lends the question, why on earth do they even have guests to begin with?

I heard a story recently of a destination wedding that was all types of annoying and messy. The couple really took the "this is our day and we'll do whatever we want" to heart, which is fine, but then they dragged way too many people into the void and it got complicated, both financially and logistically.

This couple wanted to just "play everything by ear", so nothing was actually planned...they had 20 some people show up at an amusement park and winged it from there for 3 days. Accordingly to my co-worker, who is a cousin of the groom, it was 3 days of pure hell. From getting awoken at 5am without warning for photos as the sun came up, to witnessing shouting matches between family members, to being exhausted and overheated (this was a few weeks ago, in South Carolina) from walking around and standing in lines all day. And keeping everyone together was like herding cats.

In my opinion, the couple was extremely inconsiderate to their friends and family not to mention just plain stupid. I think you have to have some structure to your event and give serious thought to how you much you care about the comfort and convenience for your guests. That is, if your brain even works that way.

Personally, I like the idea of eloping and just having a picnic or party when you come back. Makes so much sense. Friends of mine who recently hosted a fabulous example of this are Brandy and Mike. They kept it super casual by having it a picnic grove in a nearby park. It was mostly potluck, and there was plenty of it! I loved how they got mismatched furniture from thrift stores and scattered it around for seating. The decor was breezy and very 'thrift-store cool'. They had a great bluegrass band play, and overall it was an excellent way to honor their upcoming marriage and who they are as people. I was very impressed. Also, anywhere I can go barefoot automatically makes me happy. :)

A mild sense of panic...

I haven't updated this since March 15?! What kind of blogger bride-to-be am I? I'm a busy-as-hell, borderline burned out and broke one, that's what kind!

But somehow, in between the 12 hour work days and random health crises, I've managed to Get Shit Done. Not a ton of shit, but a good amount nonetheless. And some mega unexpected but wonderful stuff happened too!

Where to start...well, to follow up from the previous post about the catering fiasco...after my meeting, the fiasco grew and gained speed. I won't delve into all of the finite details of my caterer's douchebaggery, but I will say that after 6 weeks of him not responding to my calls and emails, I was pretty upset. Then when he FINALLY sent over the contract and estimated total...I was even more upset.

After another round of conversations with him, I realized that this was a battle I was not going to win. They cut corners and discounted as much of the reception costs as they could but since they only use sustainable products, locally grown food and other heartwarming ways to save the planet...my catering costs are going to be significantly higher than a typical caterer and there is not a goddamn thing I can do about it.

Moving on!

I've purchased (almost) all of the components of my bridal ensemble! The shoes, which I was going crazy looking for, were found by my friend Allison, who happily took on the task of hunting them down. They are absolutely perfect, I can't believe she was able to find them and they were only $60 (which is, by the way, the most expensive purchase yet for my dress). The other item was my veil - which I found on eBay from some shop in New York, brand new, for $30! It is a "cathedral style" veil, which means it will serve as my "train" since my dress will not have one. Lastly, my hosiery - I think it will be completely okay to wear flesh-tone fishnets, yes? Next will be fabric and supplies for the dress modifications that I'm having done. Oh, and I mustn't forget a new pair of Spanx!

My custom bridal jewelery is in progress! Thanks to my lovely friend Marci, proprietor of Baubles Trinkets Gems. I am so excited to have something different than most of the boring "bridal jewelery" I've seen online.

I've secured a florist! She is a local independent florist who works out of her home (just like my Mom was) and I am excited to see what she creates, as I've given her full creative license to design my flowers! Her name is Carrie and you can check out her stuff on her site.

I've secured a videographer! Like Carrie, he works out of his home - which means more down-to-earth service, less overhead and attitude!

I've figured out and purchased almost everything I need for the reception centerpieces - which I am making myself, versus the florist (this saves PILES of money).

I've figured out and purchased everything I need to make the invitations - which will be like tiny art projects, but something I really wanted to stand out. A show piece, if you will. I am in the middle of crafting the text for all of the components of the invitations. Next will come the printing of said components, custom cutting, then assembling, then mailing. Thankfully, I will have the help of my sister and friends with this one, as it's going to be a major effort. I am shooting to have the invitations mailed out by mid-July.

We've picked out our wedding bands - again, hooray for the internet - they will be less than $300 combined! Hair appointments booked! Wedding favors done!

We've figured out our wedding night plans - and decided to just stay at the hotel our out-of-town guests are staying in, versus the lavish boutiquey b&b we were going to choose. This way, we can have brunch the next day with them, and whomever else, in a much more casual setting.

CAKE! So included with my catering was going to be a cake from one of either two bakeries. Well, after we had a TERRIBLE cake tasting experience at one, and I heard nothing but bad reviews about the other, I asked my caterer if I may choose my own bakery for the cake. After some balking, he caved. So I am excited to get this set up - which is on my to-do list for this week. I attended a bridal show a few weeks ago and tried some delicious samples from a local bakery whom I am hoping will be available to make the cake.

Speaking of that bridal show......a mega unexpected but wonderful thing happened......I entered a grand prize drawing (one of dozens) for 1/2 off the services of a "day-of" wedding coordinator! Of all things, I think this will be very helpful to have. The coordinator actually takes over handling all of the vendors and technical details in the last 2 weeks before the wedding. On the day-of, she and another person handle all logistics, decorating and vendors so that neither myself or a guest has to. It sounds like a pretty good deal to me!

Wow, this post is becoming rather long. But there is much more to tell...! I'll try to sum it up better.

I've been in hunter/gatherer mode. I've found so many wonderful and unique components for my wedding by thinking outside of the box, and utilizing places like eBay, Etsy, local thrift and craft stores. I have yet to really purchase anything from an actual wedding store, either online or in person. I'm aiming to keep it that way!

There is still so much to do...I have to tackle things like the invitations, seating charts, programs, music, tuxes, random decorations, cookies for cookie tables, transportation, booze/beer, signage, photography, my Mom's ensemble, helping with bridesmaid stuff...and oh yes, our wedding shower!

We've decided to take a different approach and not have a traditional "bridal shower" for me. I personally find it rather obnoxious to sit in the the center of a room and have a bunch of women watch me open presents and then expect those people to get me even more presents for the wedding. Nope, I'd rather have a super casual setting, and celebrate both of us embarking on this crazy wedding together. No gifts from the registries, just a bottle of wine or booze from each guest, to help us build our stock. I dunno, I think it's a great idea (thanks Steph!).

Shoot, I could keep going...but I think you get the picture! The take-away from this post is that I really need to stay focused, as this is a pivotal month! In 3 weeks, it will be just 3 months until we say "I Do"...scary but exciting!

Preparing to do BATTLE

This past weekend, I regaled and horrified some friends with the details of our catering situation. Since this week will hopefully bring the disaster to a close, I figured I'd mention it here.

During the hunt for a reception venue last summer, it became apparent that most places only have specific caterers that they work with. Many places like hotels and privately owned facilities simply do not allow outside catering of any kind. Most of them only use one caterer, but a few have a short list of "approved" caterers. The Phipps Conservatory and Botanical Gardens was one such place.

The Past 6 Months

Before I launch into an exhaustive diatribe about the wedding planning madness I've experienced in the past six months, let me say this: I knew it was time to finally update this blog when I found myself stressing over what type of silverware defines me as a person.

How the eff did this happen? Well, let me tell you...that is, if you dare to dive into my wacky world of wedding planning and get brought up to speed.

Let The Countdown Begin!

So tomorrow will mark 1 year to the day until our wedding. Sure, that's a long time from now. But I'm sure time will fly. It always does.

I'm feeling more and more satisified with the date we chose. October 1st almost guarantees comfortable weather as it's been a blissful 65° to 70° in the 'Burgh all week. Of course there is always the threat of rain, but as long as I'm not drenched in sweat or trudging through snow on the way to the chapel, I'll be a happy bride.

I posted the following pictures on my Facebook, but not here. I'm moreorless including them for posterity. Here are a few shot of our reception venue, the Phipps Garden Center, which we have officially secured between the hours of 6:00pm and 11:00pm on Saturday October 1, 2011.

  

  

The other exciting update is the acquisition of my wedding gown, rather, the foundation for it. As I mentioned in my previous entry, I purchased it from someone on eBay who apparently wore it in a drag show. The dress came in great condition, but definitely must be cleaned throughly. The scent of perfume was pretty intense when I pulled it out of the box. It fit me very well...which was a pleasant surprise. Since I am going to have it tailored and customized, I think this will significantly make the whole process easier versus starting from scratch with a pattern. Here are the pictures:

  

 

Well, that's about it for now. We've been loosely working on the other planning, mostly still just tossing around ideas. I did get confirmation that we have officially reserved the chapel at my Mom's nursing facility for the wedding, which will be at 3:00pm. The resident pastor, a wonderful woman named Gaia Thompson, who has grown very close to my Mother, sister and I during the past 3 years, will be officiating.

Good stuff all 'round. :)

Fun Stuff!

As some of you saw on Facebook, I bought my wedding dress from a drag queen on eBay yesterday for $50.

As you may or may not know, I was planning on having my dress hand made by a friend of a friend who is a seamstress by profession. The dress I want is vintage-inspired - definitely nothing I can find in a regular wedding dress shop. One option was to find a pattern, buy the fabric and go from there. Another option was to find a "base" dress and alter the hell out of it. Surprisingly, I am told that is actually the easier option of the two.

So I began poking around eBay, Etsy and the like. Found a few possibles. Poked some more. Found some on eBay that were very simple and easily "alterable". One of which was apparently worn by a drag queen. I had emailed the seller to ask for more specific details and pictures. She told me that she had made it for her roommate (the drag queen, who only wore it once) and was now selling it on eBay. It's surprisingly simple, but very close to what I want...and amazingly my size. Anyways, I impuslively outbid everyone and won the auction yesterday.

I figure, even if I don't like it, it was only $50 and I'm sure I can sell it again on eBay. I can't wait to see it though. I'll post pictures when it arrives. :)

In other news...we changed the date!!!

We are crazy, we know this. But as it turned out, the reception venue we've (pretty much) chosen is not available on 11/11/11. Which was fine, because I had already decided that having a wedding on a Friday is just annoying for everyone. I have no idea why I didn't think about it before. I went to a Friday 4pm wedding in the city once before - totally annoying with traffic, coming from work, people having to take off work, etc.

I know it's "my day" and I should do what I want, but seriously...we weren't that emotionally attached to that date. We just thought it would be cool. And since we're having guests, we'd like to make it easy on them...and ourselves! So once we nixxed that date, we decided that we'd rather not have the wedding any later in November...weather, the holidays, etc. So upon examining the calendar...and deciding on October as the month...we settled on Saturday October 1st as the date we will get hitched.

The weather will be nicer...it's not too close to Halloween...'cause of course, we can't mess with that, it's too important of a holiday. :P

Things are really starting to take shape now, and we are pretty damn happy about it. :)

A Mild Setback

So even though the day is pretty far away, I decided to begin shopping around for a reception venue a few weeks ago. I really had no idea how much a typical reception can be, so I wanted to get a handle on it so we know what we are dealing with.

The place I had my heart set on was actually one of the boats in Pittsbugh's Gateway Clipper Fleet. I attended a wedding reception of a former co-worker several years ago and it was AWESOME.

Like many places, they have an "all-in-one" deal where they basically provide everything: the cake, booze/bartenders, table/chairs/linens, outstanding food, free parking for guests and 1 night stay in the Sheraton which is next to the dock...for one price. All we have to do is show up! Sounds like a great deal, right? Well sure...if you have a spare $16,000 laying around.

We Set a Date!!!

Yup. We've settled on the date: November 11, 2011. I am so happy! It's like this huge weight has been lifted, I finally have an end point to focus on. That being said, we have 515 days until the date.

Don't fret, I'm not completely psycho, I only know this because of this awesome website I'm using: Wedding Wire. They have a neat little counter on my "dashboard". And I just found a Blogger Widget that does the same thing!

Wedding Wire is great site because it organizes everything you can possibly imagine for your wedding. It's like a free wedding planner - I love it. Especially the "budget manager". It does that spiffy thing where it auto-calculates how much you can spend on what based off of the total you want to spend. Then, it produces pie charts that you can adjust based on what you want to spend for each item. PIE CHARTS. How can you not love that?

WTF: Dress Sites Suck!

This is by no way a relevant or meaningful update. More of a pointless mini-rant, really.

I had a pocket of time this morning that I spent aimlessly stumbling around the net. Suddenly, I found myself clicking through wedding dress sites. GOOD GOD...finding a dress may be more difficult than I thought.

First off, what the hell is up with all these sites that have pages upon pages of dresses with NO PRICES?! Aside from David's Bridal, I can't seem to find any comprehensive sites that have their dresses organized with prices. And there also seems to be alot of 'scammy sites' out there, which is kinda annoying.

My sights are set...

Well, I have a date in mind. It hit me like a bolt of lightning about a week ago. I was clicking through my Outlook calendar at work, checking a date for a conference my company usually attends.

Now, I've already accepted the fact that the wedding wouldn't take place until next year at the *earliest*. But as I think I mentioned before, I'd prefer if it wasn't any later than next year.

So I got to September 2011. And to my surprise and delight, the 10th falls on a Saturday - PERFECT! Are you ready for this?

Our wedding date would be...9-10-11!!!!

I'll take the physical challenge, please.

Even though we don't have a date set, I intend to lose some serious weight before I walk down the aisle.

I've been a lazy sack of shit most of my life. The last time I engaged in regular physical activity was when I was 12 years old and played league soccer. Soon after that, I sank into a hazy, sedentary lifestyle that has basically stripped my body of all muscle tone and allowed the fat to pile on to my 5'3" frame.

Some background info...

I should probably start off with some basic background information. First of all, Dan and I have been together for a little over 2 years.

We've known for a long time that we wanted to share our lives together. In fact, after only a few weeks into the relationship, I think we both knew it. It was like this mutual, unspoken, terrifying realization. It was very weird...mostly because I'd never felt that way about anyone before.

I was actually mad because I was suddenly living a cliche. They say when you meet the person you are to spend your life with, "you just know it"...and well, that is exactly what I felt. Very weird...but true, at least, for me.

So it begins...

Ah, the first post. It feel so fresh and clean! This blog has yet to be tainted by my pedantic thoughts, broad generalizations, and delusions of grandeur! Enjoy it while it lasts, dear reader. Because I have a feeling this blog may become a vile cesspool of wedding banter.

I should mention right away that I generally hate weddings. Rather, I hate most wedding STUFF. Particularly all the obnoxiously over-priced products, services, traditions, hype and wedding-related crap shoved down our throats from the time we can walk till the time we stumble down the aisle.

I hate most BRIDES. They are often horrifying, puzzling pieces of work. I have observed close to 20 years of wedding stupidity. Family, friends and total strangers have not escaped my scrutinizing eye. So I am fairly confident that I've got a solid understanding and awareness about becoming a *shudder* B-R-I-D-E.