A mild sense of panic...

I haven't updated this since March 15?! What kind of blogger bride-to-be am I? I'm a busy-as-hell, borderline burned out and broke one, that's what kind!

But somehow, in between the 12 hour work days and random health crises, I've managed to Get Shit Done. Not a ton of shit, but a good amount nonetheless. And some mega unexpected but wonderful stuff happened too!

Where to start...well, to follow up from the previous post about the catering fiasco...after my meeting, the fiasco grew and gained speed. I won't delve into all of the finite details of my caterer's douchebaggery, but I will say that after 6 weeks of him not responding to my calls and emails, I was pretty upset. Then when he FINALLY sent over the contract and estimated total...I was even more upset.

After another round of conversations with him, I realized that this was a battle I was not going to win. They cut corners and discounted as much of the reception costs as they could but since they only use sustainable products, locally grown food and other heartwarming ways to save the planet...my catering costs are going to be significantly higher than a typical caterer and there is not a goddamn thing I can do about it.

Moving on!

I've purchased (almost) all of the components of my bridal ensemble! The shoes, which I was going crazy looking for, were found by my friend Allison, who happily took on the task of hunting them down. They are absolutely perfect, I can't believe she was able to find them and they were only $60 (which is, by the way, the most expensive purchase yet for my dress). The other item was my veil - which I found on eBay from some shop in New York, brand new, for $30! It is a "cathedral style" veil, which means it will serve as my "train" since my dress will not have one. Lastly, my hosiery - I think it will be completely okay to wear flesh-tone fishnets, yes? Next will be fabric and supplies for the dress modifications that I'm having done. Oh, and I mustn't forget a new pair of Spanx!

My custom bridal jewelery is in progress! Thanks to my lovely friend Marci, proprietor of Baubles Trinkets Gems. I am so excited to have something different than most of the boring "bridal jewelery" I've seen online.

I've secured a florist! She is a local independent florist who works out of her home (just like my Mom was) and I am excited to see what she creates, as I've given her full creative license to design my flowers! Her name is Carrie and you can check out her stuff on her site.

I've secured a videographer! Like Carrie, he works out of his home - which means more down-to-earth service, less overhead and attitude!

I've figured out and purchased almost everything I need for the reception centerpieces - which I am making myself, versus the florist (this saves PILES of money).

I've figured out and purchased everything I need to make the invitations - which will be like tiny art projects, but something I really wanted to stand out. A show piece, if you will. I am in the middle of crafting the text for all of the components of the invitations. Next will come the printing of said components, custom cutting, then assembling, then mailing. Thankfully, I will have the help of my sister and friends with this one, as it's going to be a major effort. I am shooting to have the invitations mailed out by mid-July.

We've picked out our wedding bands - again, hooray for the internet - they will be less than $300 combined! Hair appointments booked! Wedding favors done!

We've figured out our wedding night plans - and decided to just stay at the hotel our out-of-town guests are staying in, versus the lavish boutiquey b&b we were going to choose. This way, we can have brunch the next day with them, and whomever else, in a much more casual setting.

CAKE! So included with my catering was going to be a cake from one of either two bakeries. Well, after we had a TERRIBLE cake tasting experience at one, and I heard nothing but bad reviews about the other, I asked my caterer if I may choose my own bakery for the cake. After some balking, he caved. So I am excited to get this set up - which is on my to-do list for this week. I attended a bridal show a few weeks ago and tried some delicious samples from a local bakery whom I am hoping will be available to make the cake.

Speaking of that bridal show......a mega unexpected but wonderful thing happened......I entered a grand prize drawing (one of dozens) for 1/2 off the services of a "day-of" wedding coordinator! Of all things, I think this will be very helpful to have. The coordinator actually takes over handling all of the vendors and technical details in the last 2 weeks before the wedding. On the day-of, she and another person handle all logistics, decorating and vendors so that neither myself or a guest has to. It sounds like a pretty good deal to me!

Wow, this post is becoming rather long. But there is much more to tell...! I'll try to sum it up better.

I've been in hunter/gatherer mode. I've found so many wonderful and unique components for my wedding by thinking outside of the box, and utilizing places like eBay, Etsy, local thrift and craft stores. I have yet to really purchase anything from an actual wedding store, either online or in person. I'm aiming to keep it that way!

There is still so much to do...I have to tackle things like the invitations, seating charts, programs, music, tuxes, random decorations, cookies for cookie tables, transportation, booze/beer, signage, photography, my Mom's ensemble, helping with bridesmaid stuff...and oh yes, our wedding shower!

We've decided to take a different approach and not have a traditional "bridal shower" for me. I personally find it rather obnoxious to sit in the the center of a room and have a bunch of women watch me open presents and then expect those people to get me even more presents for the wedding. Nope, I'd rather have a super casual setting, and celebrate both of us embarking on this crazy wedding together. No gifts from the registries, just a bottle of wine or booze from each guest, to help us build our stock. I dunno, I think it's a great idea (thanks Steph!).

Shoot, I could keep going...but I think you get the picture! The take-away from this post is that I really need to stay focused, as this is a pivotal month! In 3 weeks, it will be just 3 months until we say "I Do"...scary but exciting!

Preparing to do BATTLE

This past weekend, I regaled and horrified some friends with the details of our catering situation. Since this week will hopefully bring the disaster to a close, I figured I'd mention it here.

During the hunt for a reception venue last summer, it became apparent that most places only have specific caterers that they work with. Many places like hotels and privately owned facilities simply do not allow outside catering of any kind. Most of them only use one caterer, but a few have a short list of "approved" caterers. The Phipps Conservatory and Botanical Gardens was one such place.

The Past 6 Months

Before I launch into an exhaustive diatribe about the wedding planning madness I've experienced in the past six months, let me say this: I knew it was time to finally update this blog when I found myself stressing over what type of silverware defines me as a person.

How the eff did this happen? Well, let me tell you...that is, if you dare to dive into my wacky world of wedding planning and get brought up to speed.

Let The Countdown Begin!

So tomorrow will mark 1 year to the day until our wedding. Sure, that's a long time from now. But I'm sure time will fly. It always does.

I'm feeling more and more satisified with the date we chose. October 1st almost guarantees comfortable weather as it's been a blissful 65° to 70° in the 'Burgh all week. Of course there is always the threat of rain, but as long as I'm not drenched in sweat or trudging through snow on the way to the chapel, I'll be a happy bride.

I posted the following pictures on my Facebook, but not here. I'm moreorless including them for posterity. Here are a few shot of our reception venue, the Phipps Garden Center, which we have officially secured between the hours of 6:00pm and 11:00pm on Saturday October 1, 2011.

  

  

The other exciting update is the acquisition of my wedding gown, rather, the foundation for it. As I mentioned in my previous entry, I purchased it from someone on eBay who apparently wore it in a drag show. The dress came in great condition, but definitely must be cleaned throughly. The scent of perfume was pretty intense when I pulled it out of the box. It fit me very well...which was a pleasant surprise. Since I am going to have it tailored and customized, I think this will significantly make the whole process easier versus starting from scratch with a pattern. Here are the pictures:

  

 

Well, that's about it for now. We've been loosely working on the other planning, mostly still just tossing around ideas. I did get confirmation that we have officially reserved the chapel at my Mom's nursing facility for the wedding, which will be at 3:00pm. The resident pastor, a wonderful woman named Gaia Thompson, who has grown very close to my Mother, sister and I during the past 3 years, will be officiating.

Good stuff all 'round. :)

Fun Stuff!

As some of you saw on Facebook, I bought my wedding dress from a drag queen on eBay yesterday for $50.

As you may or may not know, I was planning on having my dress hand made by a friend of a friend who is a seamstress by profession. The dress I want is vintage-inspired - definitely nothing I can find in a regular wedding dress shop. One option was to find a pattern, buy the fabric and go from there. Another option was to find a "base" dress and alter the hell out of it. Surprisingly, I am told that is actually the easier option of the two.

So I began poking around eBay, Etsy and the like. Found a few possibles. Poked some more. Found some on eBay that were very simple and easily "alterable". One of which was apparently worn by a drag queen. I had emailed the seller to ask for more specific details and pictures. She told me that she had made it for her roommate (the drag queen, who only wore it once) and was now selling it on eBay. It's surprisingly simple, but very close to what I want...and amazingly my size. Anyways, I impuslively outbid everyone and won the auction yesterday.

I figure, even if I don't like it, it was only $50 and I'm sure I can sell it again on eBay. I can't wait to see it though. I'll post pictures when it arrives. :)

In other news...we changed the date!!!

We are crazy, we know this. But as it turned out, the reception venue we've (pretty much) chosen is not available on 11/11/11. Which was fine, because I had already decided that having a wedding on a Friday is just annoying for everyone. I have no idea why I didn't think about it before. I went to a Friday 4pm wedding in the city once before - totally annoying with traffic, coming from work, people having to take off work, etc.

I know it's "my day" and I should do what I want, but seriously...we weren't that emotionally attached to that date. We just thought it would be cool. And since we're having guests, we'd like to make it easy on them...and ourselves! So once we nixxed that date, we decided that we'd rather not have the wedding any later in November...weather, the holidays, etc. So upon examining the calendar...and deciding on October as the month...we settled on Saturday October 1st as the date we will get hitched.

The weather will be nicer...it's not too close to Halloween...'cause of course, we can't mess with that, it's too important of a holiday. :P

Things are really starting to take shape now, and we are pretty damn happy about it. :)

A Mild Setback

So even though the day is pretty far away, I decided to begin shopping around for a reception venue a few weeks ago. I really had no idea how much a typical reception can be, so I wanted to get a handle on it so we know what we are dealing with.

The place I had my heart set on was actually one of the boats in Pittsbugh's Gateway Clipper Fleet. I attended a wedding reception of a former co-worker several years ago and it was AWESOME.

Like many places, they have an "all-in-one" deal where they basically provide everything: the cake, booze/bartenders, table/chairs/linens, outstanding food, free parking for guests and 1 night stay in the Sheraton which is next to the dock...for one price. All we have to do is show up! Sounds like a great deal, right? Well sure...if you have a spare $16,000 laying around.

We Set a Date!!!

Yup. We've settled on the date: November 11, 2011. I am so happy! It's like this huge weight has been lifted, I finally have an end point to focus on. That being said, we have 515 days until the date.

Don't fret, I'm not completely psycho, I only know this because of this awesome website I'm using: Wedding Wire. They have a neat little counter on my "dashboard". And I just found a Blogger Widget that does the same thing!

Wedding Wire is great site because it organizes everything you can possibly imagine for your wedding. It's like a free wedding planner - I love it. Especially the "budget manager". It does that spiffy thing where it auto-calculates how much you can spend on what based off of the total you want to spend. Then, it produces pie charts that you can adjust based on what you want to spend for each item. PIE CHARTS. How can you not love that?